Shanti (not real name) tried to cover up her bruises with makeup.
When it was too obvious, she said she had fallen down the stairs.
But the violence was on going and there was never a time when she was bruise free. Therefore, she just shut herself at home and did not go out for days, weeks and months at a stretch.
Shanti realised that this was a perennial problem, but was too ashamed to admit it to her friends. She had no family in Auckland and calling her old parents in India and telling them about the violence she was subjected to was out of the question.
One day, a friend who had been trying to reach her and was worried at the lack of communication, visited her at home. She saw her bruises and the internal wounds that hurt more than the physical pain.
She suggested that Shanti should see a counsellor on how to deal with her emotions and be strong. But Shanti felt ashamed, isolated and too weak to help herself.
“I think a door opened for me when this friend suggested I join the Migrant and Refugee Group run by ‘Home and Family Counselling.’ I did not know what to expect, but I knew I was not going for one-on-one counselling. I felt safer being part of a group of women,” she said.
Shanti said her first session with the group opened her eyes to the fact that she was not alone in such a predicament. Every person in the group had gone through varied degrees of domestic violence and as we progressed through the session, I knew I would emerge strong.
The group run by Home and Family Counselling is free of cost to migrant and refugee women.
Counsellor Muriel Castelino said most of the women are from the neighbouring areas and hence find it convenient to attend counselling sessions.
“Many of them are dependent on the ‘tormentor’ for both money and transport and we want to make it as easy for them as possible to attend,” she said.
The programme uses group counselling to deal with trauma.
Ms Castelino, Estelle Mendelsohn and Angelika Chisholm, who are experienced in dealing with trauma of women and victims of domestic violence, coordinate the sessions.
Counselling Awareness Week
May 9 to 15, 2011
Launch by Governor General Sir Anand Satyanand
Slogan Competition
We say, ‘It’s better to talk.” What do you say?
Write a slogan of up to 12 words in any language promoting Counselling.
The Winning Entry will receive a fabulous mystery prize basket at a Celebration Breakfast on May 10 at Sorrento in the Park, One Tree Hill. The Winner will be notified on May 6, 2011.
Enter online www.homeandfamily.org.nz; post entries to P O Box 67120 Mt Eden, Auckland 1349 or Email pr@homeandfamily.org.nz on or before May 4, 2011.
Include name, age, contact number and address. All short-listed entries will be notified on our website.
For additional information and to register for the next group, call 6308961 (Extn 0).
