Marriages in India have undergone a sea of change, amalgamating the best practises of the Indian and Western cultures.
But the firm belief in the sacred institution of marriage and its importance for families and the society continues to distinguish Indian marriages from others.
The concept of “Big Fat Indian Wedding” has been fine-tuned to synchronise with today’s smartphone-wielding generation.
The most visible change is the acceptance of arranged love marriages by families.
Parents now repose trust in their wards and their choice of a life partner.
They endeavour to make it a fruitful alliance between the two families.
Eternal bond
Indian culture considers marriage as the formation of an eternal relationship between two families and not just as a partnership between couples.
This has indirectly helped the Indian society to eliminate prejudices and get rid of concepts of same caste marriage and social evils like dowry.
Elaborate preparations and use of professional agencies and organisations have become a common factor in Indian weddings. Most events go according to a ‘Wedding Planner,’ which would include a gamut of operations ranging from ‘matching of horoscope’ to the honeymoon of the newlyweds.
Some families, brides and grooms prefer ‘compressed weddings’ due either to paucity of time and venue or both.
However, even such weddings do not skip family get-togethers such as engagement and mehandi ceremonies. Bollywood has had its influence in terms of fashion and style.
The modern day weddings are less stressful, since there is considerable time lapse between the day of engagement and marriage, providing many opportunities for the betrothed to meet and discuss their marriage plans and shaping the family.
Our Staff Reporter writes:
It is often said that Indians living overseas are more conscious of their culture and traditions and anxious to follow them, especially while organising the marriages of their children.
The Bedi family
That belief was true in the case of Rajinder (Raj) Bedi (Secretary, Sri Dasmesh Darbar of the Auckland Sikh Society) and Manmohan (Nimi) Kaur (Auckland City Council), who organised the wedding of their son Dasham with Sonia Gulati in Auckland in December 2011.
A HR management graduate, Dasham is a case manager at Community Link and evinces immense interest in Toastmasters, photography, Bhangra and Bollywood dances.
Sonia is a Delhi University commerce graduate with a diploma in Aviation and Hospitality Management. Vivacious and friendly, Sonia captured the hearts of everyone she met during the wedding and other related ceremonies.
A unique combination
The Bedi family wedding was a combination of traditional values and modern practices. Raj and Nimi, who marked the Silver Jubilee of their Wedding in December 2009 (Indian Newslink, January 15, 2010), were keen to involve the children in every aspect of their marriage.
“Dasham and Sonia were connected through the Internet and their blossoming love and care for each other received our blessings and of Gurdeep Singh Gulati and Manmeet Kaur (Sonia’ parents). We visited Delhi and struck an instant chord with Sonia and her family,” Mr Bedi said.
Following a gala engagement ceremony held in Delhi in March 2011, they began preparations for the marriage in Auckland in December 2011.
“Dasham and Sonia are children of the modern world and hence were keen to make their wedding memorable with stylish and trendy attire. But they did not give up their respect for tradition.
“Dasham grew a beard and tied turban like a Sikh for the wedding held at the at Sri Dasmesh Darbar (Gurdwara) on November 19, 2011, as a mark of respect for Sri Guru Granth Sahib, while Sonia was dressed in traditional ‘lehnga’ and Punjabi suit,” Mr Bedi said.
The Reception and dinner held the following day at Alexandra Park had the markings of a modern wedding, including music and dance.
Said an elderly guest, “The Dasham-Sonia wedding transcended religious and other beliefs, reinstating the fact that Indians consider marriage a sacred institution, the tenets of which should be respected and fostered. This event also proved that marriage is an institution that promotes equality between two partners, keeping them together in times of gloom and boom, adversity and prosperity, good and poor health and in youth and old age.”
